The Drinker’s Alphabet

A - Alcohol
The key to surviving college.
B - Beer
The most disgusting alcohol of all, but great for chugging.
C - Class
What you’re supposed to get up and go to after a Thursday night party.
D - Dancing
A favorite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic.
E - Emergency
The keg is empty or there is no one over 21 in your drinking party.
F - Fucked Up
Signified by leaning over a toilet puking your guts out.
G - Games
Anything that involves cards, dice and chugging beers.
H - Hang-over
Reminds you of how great last night was and how much you drank.
I - Idiot
The guy that spilled his beer on you and everyone else at the party.
J - Jail
Where you’ll end up after trying to use a fake ID or staggering home.
K - Kissing
What you’ll do to anything that moves after 15 beers.
L - Lord
Person you beg to get you out of every situation involving alcohol.
M - Money
That which you no longer have due to too much partying.
N - Not Again!
What you scream when you wake up beside someone you don’t know.
O - Oh shit!
What you say as you’re falling down the stairs.
P - Pee
What you have to do every five minutes while you’re drinking beer.
Q - Quilt
What you puked on last night in bed and have to clean in the morning.
R - Reform
What you promise god you will do while you’re puking in the toilet.
S - Sex
What you did with that person you met last night while you were drunk.
T - Ten
The number of beers it takes to get drunk.
U - Underage
Most of the drinking population in college town.
V - Vodka
The mother of all alcohol and the best way to get drunk in an hour.
W - Worm
The part of Tequila that reminds you of Biology class tomorrow.
X - X-Ray
How they can see into your stomach before they pump it.
Y - Yourself
The one who drinks way too much every weekend.
Z - Zoned
How you will be for the next 12 hours following drinking.